-
! A survival kit for the over 50's and those intending to be !
! Because you can run but you can't hide !
Its Just an Attitude
"Acting your age" is such a dumb idea I've
stopped trying ...
On The Brighter Side
You'd think, wouldn't you, approaching three
years into this bright, shiny new millennium, you could open a
newspaper, listen to radio, watch TV or websurf without being
warned about something?
Wrong.
In fact, it's so bad our so-called "newsmedia" now contain more
warnings than news. And not only the red, white, blue, green and
yellow post-9/11 kind, as if they weren't scary enough.
We can't drink coffee, eat white bread, and heaven forbid,
shower our grandchildren with the treats we'd kill for as kids
-- not what today's kids kill for -- without fear of obesity,
infertility, loss of peripheral vision, carpal tunnel syndrome,
impotence or far worse.
To give them plausibility they wouldn't have otherwise and
probably don't deserve anyway, these dire prophecies generally
result from pharmaceutical company-financed tests conducted in
universities, military installations, fitness gyms, or when they
can't find anyone else voluntarily, prisons.
If it continues like this some genius will soon capitalise on
the trend and start the first 24-hour "Cable Warning Network".
And like Ted Turner's 24-hour Cable News Network that people
laughed-at -- and some still do -- when he launched it in 1980
it will probably be a raging success.
That out of the way let me issue today's stern warning.
First, as is customary, to establish credentials, I freely
confess I have conducted no representative research or performed
clinical tests on guinea-pigs, human or otherwise. I do not
receive support from the World Health Organisation. Nor am I
angling for the Nobel Prize in Cloned Human Genetic
Manipulation.
But I have never been more sure about anything. To all you
youngsters -- and, remember, until we get to know each other
better I'll keep reminding you that anyone under 51 qualifies --
if you really want to enjoy your later years stop taking
yourself so darned seriously.
Right now, this very minute.
Believe me, I'm deadly serious and it's not only me saying it.
Others older than I tell me the same thing.
Wherever you go today, to the post office, video store, bank,
supermarket, church, ball-game, Starbuck's or Toys 'R Us, or on
the highway, you see only glum faces. And certainly far fewer of
the outrageous characters of 40 years ago.
The only exception where people seem to be having great fun
cracking jokes with, and against, each other, is in top-level
political pundit circles. Which says much about the state of our
society.
Everywhere else miserable faces are commonplace. Especially big
world metropolises like New York and London where irredeemably
sad souls with cellphones stuck to their heads are in the
majority.
Or were the last time I walked down Park Avenue or along Oxford
Street.
So for goodness sakes lighten-up.
And stop listening to all those damned warnings.
Another
Chicken Or Egg Question
What comes first ? Career or family ? ...
The "Over 50 Face"
We are each entirely responsible for our own face
after the age of 50 ...
Joys Of Senior Sex
"... when we al groped around leveling the sexual
playing field ..."
" She'll Kill Me "
No married man still breathing has not said this
at one time or another ...
So Much More To
Achieve
But I'm not getting any satisfaction ...
Say Exactly What You
Mean
One of the great joys of aging comes when we
realize we can open-up, let loose ...
Jump-In On-Line
Feel like creating something really relevant
today ? ...
Is What We See What
We Get ?
To get the best results from our limited time on
earth ....